I've tried, I tried, I tried, and I’m trying

I keep wanting to type things about her out of anger, or agree and laugh with people whenever they say anything, but I really can't. Even if the whole situation is fucked up, I'm not going to pretend that I'm over it, or over her. I've never really had someone mess around with my head like this. She threw me out, brought me back, and then threw me out again.

I don't like talking about this in second person so let me just say this straight forward.

I'm glad you feel free now. I'm not really sure what you mean by that because I don't know what I was holding you back from. Flirting with other guys? Probably. But you did that anyways, even when you had me. I guess you never have enough. No one is ever enough for you. The fact that you couldn't even talk to me after you broke up with me makes me so upset. I don't know if I meant it or not when I said I don't want to talk to you anymore, at all, after this. Because I don't want to think about you right now, but at the same time it feels like I'm waiting for a phone call, or an IM, or something just saying hi. I keep thinking about the first couple nights that we had together when we started going out and how amazing it would of been to have even more times like those later on, this summer.

But I'm smart enough to know that you shouldn't stick around with people that are this damaged. I feel sorry for you actually. I can't imagine what it would be like living the way you live. Doesn't sound very "free" to me.

At this point, I actually hope things go terribly for you.
This is said out of anger. But right now, that's how I feel.

You're heartless. And I never saw you like that before, otherwise why would I of gone out with you? I saw you as such an amazing person, and really never thought I'd find someone like this. But then last night you completely proved that what I thought, was wrong. Why the hell do I still have feelings for you? Why do I still have thoughts about wanting you back? I don't want to have any feelings for you.

I can't believe you did this right before your dad was about to leave. Right once I would be able to see you like normal relationships should be able to do. I don't think you'll find any other guy that waited around as long as I did, and I hope you realize that. I was willing to wait until summer if that's what it was going to take. But the way things are for you, the way you can never do anything, nobody else will deal with that. I guarantee it.

One thing I know is I meant everything I said, and I know that it's going to take a while to get over you. But one thing I'm almost 100% sure of is you can't say the same. You don't lose feelings with in one day if you really love somebody as much as you said you did. But now that you made it official and said it in the worst way you could say it, "Oh trust me, I won't change my mind this time, don't worry" I'm ready to forget about you and whatever we had. Disregarding you, my life is perfect right now. I hope you're happy.