ten, five, two thousand and seven

Today was absolutely terrible.
I left Jackson's house around 11:00 this morning and took the city bus home. Then I get to the house and realize that I don't have a key. And all of the doors were locked. So I took the screen off of my window to try to get through my window. But my window was locked. Same with all the other ones. I would of called my dad but he was out of town, and my phone was dead. Susan was working. My brothers were working. So I had no option but to just sit in my dads truck in the driveway and listen to music. After about 4 hours I was going out of my mind. I was pretty miserable.

BUT

Last night was a lot of fun. Just "the normal group" at Jackson's I guess. About 90% of the time I was just watching them play halo. But it was still fun. His house always is. And I got to talk to Joseph for the first time in a long time. It was cooooool.

I just cleaned my room. It looks really good. And I have my window open. And I'm listening to Built To Spill. And Susan has this cinnamon candle lit in the kitchen and it smells really good. It's starting to feel like winter again. OH BY THE WAY! WHY DID I EVER SAY I WAS GETTING TIRED OF THE HEAT? My god it's starting to get cold. I wish I could do something with people tonight. But I can't because my Grandma's 80Th birthday party is tomorrow. Maybe I can sneak out if someone can give me a ride. MAYBE MAYBE MAYBE.

I need to start saving my money to get my new camera. Since mine is broken. I'm just gonna buy the same one that I had. I think I'm gonna go mow the lawn so I can make some $$$! I wanna read my book, but I can't. I need to get my backpack out of Cameron's car. I hope Natasha isn't mad at us about last night. Hmm. If you're reading this Natasha, we're sorry. And I'm just rambling on right now. So BYE!

It's been like two days

since I've posted anything.

This week went by fast. But it was just one big mess.

I can't really write about anything exciting happening, because nothing exciting has happened. Seriously. Nothing. WAIT NO THAT'S A LIE. Tuesday Cameron and I didn't go to school. We played hookey. And oh my gosh.. it was fun. That day made me miss summer. I don't know what I'm doing tonight. I know that tomorrow night I'm staying at Nicks moms house. Saturday I might be hanging out with Maddi and some other people.

Today I have a green tea vitamin water. I just took a sip of it. Sick. That was the worst thing ever.
GROSS

WOW OKAY I FEEL SICK NOW
Bye

I promise I'll have better posts later. Haha

Random thrown out thoughts

I really don't want to go to guitar practice tonight. I'm too tired.

I'm really glad that I finished all of my homework. I feel so accomplished.

I wanna be chillin' with people at somebodies home right now

Happy birthday Caitlin Joyner. I'm sorry the milkshake I bought you was gross.

My dog just ran away. My step mom's going crazy about it. I'm scared too.

LMAO people need to stop lurking my comments

Actually I do it too. So whatever. I just need to be more careful about what I say on MySpace

I'm tired of that freshman girl that always says hi to me awkwardly. She came up to me today and said "I think you're really cool. I'm seriously not even kidding." Chelsea and I laughed.

I wanna keep reading my book. I can't set that thing down.

Susan just walked in. I wonder if she found the dog.

Ooops I never finished me vault. It's probably flat now.

She found the dog

I want to clean my room. And then just sleep.

My camera is broken. I'm gonna buy a new one. Or try to get this one fixed. My mom said she'll help pay for it. I love my mom.

It's my Moms birthday tomorrow. I called her and yelled "HAPPY BIRTHDAY" today. And she was all "UHM, IT'S NOT TIL TOMORROW YOU RETARD" I laughed.

I don't know what I'm doing this weekend. Except for Thursday and Friday

No school on Friday

I spent just about all of my lunch money today (twenty dollars)

I'm obsessed with Landlocked Blues

I guess I have to get ready for guitar. I want to just skip when they drop me off and go to Jamba Juice and call people.

OKAY BYE

We created war

We started this argument between us two. And little by little people are throwing their selves into it. More and more people are getting involved in it just about every day. This has become something I never wanted it to become. I never wanted you to hate me. I never wanted people to get in to it. I never wanted people to start yelling at you for me. But I can't blame them can I? They're just my friends. Trying to stand up for me.

I'm sick of so many people being in the middle of this.
Because nobody knows both sides of the story. They listen to one. And stick with it.

I know this week is going to be hell.

Here's a new month. I'm ready for some good change.

Kind of an 'add on' to the previous blog

I was just texting Cammisha

I think she helped me realize that I just need to take life a little slower. And stop looking for happiness, and stop looking for what I need. And just let it come to me.

Cammisha: I like your blog. I have noticed change in you. I didn't want to say anything.
Me: What change have you noticed?
Cammisha: I can't really put my finger on it. Just your so busy. And you're trying to MAKE yourself happy, instead of just letting it happen.
Me: You're exactly right..
Cammisha: You're just kind of distant. It's like I can't find you.

Thank you Cammish. And I'm sorry. You giving me the truth is actually really good for me right now. I was talking to Susan about all these friend issues and she said word by word: "As long as you have one good friend like Cammisha, then everything's fine"

She's exactly right.

AND SAME WITH YOU NICK

I'm glad you told me how you were feeling about the change in me. I'm glad you can actually tell me the truth. I needed to hear that. I know I was kind of getting upset. But it's because I wasn't letting myself accept it. You're such a good friend to me. I hope that no change in me weakens our friendship.

As for everyone else
please don't try to LOOK for change in me, just so you can point it out. But if you need to talk to me about it, talk to me about it.