You can make a plan, carve it into stone, like a feather falling it is still unknown.

When Amanda left Matthew he lost his head. He spent days making one call after another to my mom begging her for advice. He was so terrified that love would never come back to him. Matthew and I are actually exactly the same when it comes to our fears. Except the difference is he begs for people to give him answers, and me, I'm just asking all of those questions to myself in my head.

Stephanie brought back his faith. They've been together for a while now, and I've never seen him so happy in my whole life. We have six more days with him until he leaves for the army... And last night he told everybody him and Stephanie are engaged.

I spent the whole day babysitting her four year old daughter, Saleigh. While I'm sitting in the grass watching her run around she runs over and sits down on her knees next to me. I look over and smile, she smiles back with a chocolate frosting outline around her lips. Matthew pulls up in his car and Saleigh gasps for air, stands up and starts running towards him. He gets out and grabs her, holding her in the air while she's laughing loudly and kicking her feet. I was the happiest person in the world. Seeing happiness in my family doesn't compare to any amount of money, any chemical release of seretonin, any place in the world. It's the only thing I want.

While we sit downstairs he says, "I feel so lucky. You know? How all of this just fell into place for me." We talked about how everything feels like it's fixed. When we're in love we don't want to be anywhere else. When we lose love we're so certain that we are stuck in a forever loveless life. "It's hope that gets us through it all. No matter how hard it can be to believe in sometimes."



Who knows if any of us end up where we expect.
But I'm not afraid anymore. I'm sure it will be in the hands of something beautiful.